Christmas, praying, grief, hope

Good Grief, It’s Christmas

Holidays (particularly Christmas) can be some of the most difficult days during the “paper pregnancy” or waiting stage of Christmas, You hope…you pray…you wait for a miracle. Songs of kids waiting for a home for Christmas (as beautiful as the songs are) often bring tears to the eyes of the parents waiting.

adoption, pregnancy, waiting

What is a Paper Pregnancy?

“Paper Pregnancy” and Adoption. What might seem self-explanatory to some, might require explanation for others. Paper Pregnancy: having a child developing in the heart while completing a ton of paperwork, experiencing long waits and many hoops, and sometimes facing roadblocks or closed doors (read labor) in order for that child to be delivered into your arms. Want to know the first time that term was used online?

waiting, hoping, praying, girl boy cat statue, boy and girl waiting, boy and girl watching, boy and girl at window, statue in window, boy and girl looking at sky

A Physical and Emotional Miscarriage

A friend of mine faced a failed adoption. She had not only seen pictures of her child, but she had held her in her arms, smelled her, cuddled her, rocked her. What she experienced emotionally could easily be compared to the grief faced in a mid-to-late term miscarriage. Recently, my newest grandson was born at 20 weeks, lived 34 minutes, then died. I understand grief and loss.

red tape, adoption, waiting, anticipation

Seeing Red?

Is the red tape of the adoption process making you wait? Sometimes hearing about how others survived the red tape provides strength for the journey.

white dresses, flower girl, butterfly kisses


Mother’s Day can be a difficult day (season) for the woman waiting for a child. It can make the waiting of the paper pregnancy especially emotional this time of year.

shadows, timing, faith

Shedding Light on Timing

This Beth Moore quote on God’s timing and my attitude is something I wish I had seen during our adoption waiting. Many times during our decade-long journey of waiting for our daughter I struggled with God’s timing. God is outside of time. He sees the big picture. Sometimes we only see in hindsight,,,

sea, ocean, currents, waves, undertow

Whirlpools and Waves: The Paper Pregnancy

Are you in the midst of whirlpools and waves? Sometimes a paper pregnancy can be as overwhelming as the sea.

This week’s Weekly Photo Challenge is Sea–and the emotions it brings to mind.

I know that during our long journey …there were most definitely times of feeling caught in a whirlpool or undertow. Ever feel like you are drowning and might not be able to come up for air?

heart locket, girls' locket, silver locket, adoption locket

The Locket

“Valentine’s Day came and one of the most special Valentine’s of all—an e-mail from Sadie with a picture of the little girl and more information. Sweet and spicy! From that moment, I began to carry her picture in a silver heart locket…